You Broke Her, You Don’t Get To Come Back

They have told you one too many times, “One of these days you’re going to completely lose her.”

You’ve been warned and yet you remained unfazed. Of course, it wouldn’t bother you, she’ll always take you back. She’ll wait for you until you’re done with your games until you’re ready for commitment.

Her love for you was unimaginable that even the wisest person in the room could not comprehend why she keeps on falling back to you. Her love for you makes everyone wonder how someone can be such a fool for a guy who’s incapable of appreciating a wonderful woman like her.

But her love for you made her smarter, stronger. Her love for you made her realize that the moment she broke free from the tower of a mess you’ve locked her up, you’re about to lose the best thing that has ever been yours… her.

Gone are the days that she’ll wait for your call, for you to show up and pretend that you actually care, that you feel the same way. Gone are the days that she’d rather cry herself to sleep than be without you for the rest of her life.

You broke her. Every inch and every piece, every nook and cranny of her entirety. You took away her ray of sunshine, her unending glow. You made her believe that you are all she needs in this lifetime when truth be told, it has always been the other way around. YOU NEED HER.

You wanted her because she made you feel better about yourself. Because she made you feel that no matter how egotistical and self-absorbed you are, someone will always love you unconditionally… and someone will probably do, but always and forever are just words… which in reality is up to a certain extent of only how much a good heart can take.

She had to endure and watched her whole world collapsed just because she made it revolved around you. She looked at the mirror, at the girl she barely recognizes. Her heart ached for the person she became, but she was grateful for the person you made her see… the fool she was with bruised knees and bruised heart.

You broke her… and she found peace in it.

And as if the universe is playing its tricks on you… she’s right there, parading your way with a genuine smile you haven’t seen in her for a long while.

The sudden realization of how amazing she had always been dawns on you. She’s in her new world now. Built with high walls strong enough to weather the storm. With doors and locks which none of your old keys would ever fit.

She’s happy… and she’s without you.

She might look at you with a familiar feeling, but this time she’ll be the one who’ll remain unfazed. And no matter how many times you try to knock on her door, it would never open up for you again. You completely lost her that moment you failed to see that she was enough, that she was everything.

When you leave something worth keeping for something transient… you don’t get to come back. 

By Mary Louise Vern Ignacio for ThoughtCatalog