It’s just really unfortunate whenever you find out that the person you’re in a supposedly loving relationship with is just settling for being with you. Naturally, you would want any person that you would fall in love with to also be in love with you in return. You deserve that.
But unfortunately, the universe doesn’t always give us what we want or what we deserve. We can still end up in relationships with people who don’t really love us – people who are just settling for being with us. And according to leading experts in the field, if you are perceptive enough, you will be able to spot the signs that your partner is merely settling for you – and that they’re not really in love with you.
Contrary to what many people may think, it actually takes a lot of effort and energy to settle for a relationship with someone. There is just so much acting and deceit that goes into settling in a relationship that it can really take a lot out of a person. For instance, if your partner is merely settling with you, then they genuinely have to put on a show whenever you try to be intimate and affectionate towards them.
They will try to emulate the feelings that you have for them – but it is all just so unnatural and inorganic. It’s all fake and it really takes a lot of effort to take your own feelings for another person. Truthfully speaking, no relationship is ever going to be simple or effortless. But when the love in a relationship is real, then the expression and manifestation of that love shouldn’t require too much effort at all. It takes a whole lot more effort to be fake than to be authentic.
When you love another person, you are going to want to make sure that that person feels as included and as involved in your life as possible. You want to make sure that you don’t go in with your life having your partner as a mere spectator. You want them to feel everything that you feel. You want them to be a part of all of your experiences.
You want them to be a part of any major decisions that you might have to make concerning your life and the relationship. And that all requires a great amount of energy. And when someone gets tired in a relationship, then that’s when a person’s true colors will start to show. No matter how tired you might be, if you love someone, you are going to love that person consistently. But when you’re faking that love and you have no more energy to put up with that charade, then it starts to become a lot more evident.
But there are other ways to tell if your partner’s love for you is authentic or not. You just have to be able to know the signs so that you can be on the lookout for them.
1. They don’t really express a real interest in the different facets of your life.
They don’t really try to get to know you better. They aren’t really all that interested in getting closer to you and building that connection between the two of you. Your partner doesn’t really take the time to go deep into what makes up your character and personality.
2. Your relationship doesn’t really feel like a partnership.
You’re more like two people who are just living individual lives alongside one another than two people who are in a relationship together.
3. Your partner is very critical of your behavior.
Your partner already doesn’t exactly like the unideal circumstances that surround your relationship. And so that’s why they will try to criticize and change you in however way they can to turn you into the person that they want you to be.
4. The only time the two of you ever really connect with one another is when you’re having sex.
Sex is great in a relationship. However, if sex is the absolute pinnacle of intimacy and connection that the two of you have as a couple, then that’s not a good sign.
5. Your partner doesn’t really make it a point to plan for your relationship.
Your relationship is more like a casual agreement between two people; an agreement to just stay together without having any real direction or motivation to see things through until the end.
6. You constantly feel undervalued and unappreciated in the relationship.
You never feel like you are given importance or priority. You feel more like an accessory to the life of your partner than an actual human being.
7. You don’t feel like you can freely express your opinions.
You never feel like you have a safe space to express yourself. And if you ever do, you never feel like you are being heard or being paid attention to. It’s like anything that comes out of your mouth just falls on deaf ears. No one makes you feel heard in your relationship.