It feels like I’ve dated half of the single male population over the years, and I’m exhausted AF from trying to figure out what’s wrong with them all. Most guys these days have zero clue what they want, but they’re more than willing to string you along while they attempt to zone in on it, and it usually leads to disappointment every time. It’s complete garbage and I’m over it. I’m done dating guys who don’t know what they want.
1. I’M DONE WITH WASTING MY TIME.
I have better things to do with my time than to spend it dating some guy who doesn’t even know wtf he’s doing or where he wants things to go. And by better things, I mean probably watching Netflix with my cat. Besides, a guy who knows what he wants will date me more thoughtfully and I’d rather line my future with more pleasant endeavors that could lead to forever than to add one more loser to my long list of failures.
2. IT’S NOT MY JOB TO TEACH SOMEONE THE VALUE OF LOVE.
It’s not up to me to show a guy how amazing I am in hopes that I’ll change his mind about his commitment-phobia — screw that. What am I, a kindergarten teacher? If a guy isn’t ready and says it, I take it at face value and move on. I know better now. A guy who knows what he wants already knows how awesome being in love is and doesn’t tiptoe around excuses to avoid it like it’s a death sentence.
3. IT’S AN EXCUSE TO SLACK OFF.
It’s been my experience that guys who use these crutch lines to avoid getting serious usually only say it because they’re lazy little jerks. They use it as a fallback reason to absolve themselves from disappointing me and I’m looking for a guy who’s ready the same way I am to put in work to form something real. I have zero time for these other bozos anymore.
4. I REFUSE TO BE STRUNG ALONG ANYMORE.
I’m done with being led on and strung along to the point that I think something real is about to happen only to be completely disappointed, not to mentioned fooled into wasting my energy. From now on, I’m making my relationship intentions clear as day and if a guy is scared off by my honesty or isn’t looking for the same things, I’ll raise my hand and wave him goodbye.
5. I’M LOOKING FOR A REAL MAN WHO ACTUALLY ACTS LIKE ONE.
I’m at an age now where if guys that I’m into still don’t know what they want out of life and love, they’re not mature enough for me to begin with. I’m looking for a real man who has a plan, not one who’s still trying to figure his crap out.
6. I WON’T BE HELD BACK ANYMORE FROM WHAT I’M LOOKING FOR.
Dating guys who don’t know what they want only hold me back from what I’m looking for. What’s the point in spending the time and the gamble on someone who can easily scapegoat his way out of forming a relationship because he said he wasn’t looking for anything serious? Like I said, I know better now and I accept these lines at face value- they’re always the truth.
7. THE RIGHT GUY WON’T FEED ME THIS BS.
The right guy for me isn’t going to dance around committing to a real relationship because I’m not willing to accept less than what I want — it’s that simple. I’ll walk away from those guys who are “just going with the flow” and make room for those guys who say that they’re honestly looking for someone special. Even if that someone doesn’t turn out to be me, at least we’re both going into things with the same intentions- and that’s more important.
8. I KNOW WHAT I WANT.
I know exactly what I’m looking for, so why would I waste my time with someone who doesn’t? If he hasn’t figured it out by now, it’s possible he never will. No thank you — he can take his issues elsewhere.
9. IT’S TIME TO GROW UP.
I’m a grown woman looking for someone equally as grown to spend and share my life with- I won’t have it any other way. I’m done with dating guys who don’t know what they want, because I do and I’m not looking to go backwards in my journey.
By Andrea Wesley for Bolde