I’ve been beaten down a lot in my search to find love, but there’s one thing in the back of my mind that really keeps me going: sooner or later, that right guy is coming for me and I’m fully ready for it. It’s having my heart broken so many times in the past that has allowed me to love in a way I never imagined. The guy who finally earns my heart is going to be the luckiest guy around — here’s why:
1. I APPRECIATE THE DETAILS.
I’ve been treated like dirt so many times that any time a guy does something truly thoughtful and courteous, it stands out to me in a big way. I’m not going to be one of those nagging girlfriends who gets on my guy’s ass over every minor annoyance or mistakes when there’s plenty of good he’s doing too. I don’t overlook the small things because I know collectively, they amount to something really big — a man who deserves my time and affections.
2. NO EFFORT GOES UNNOTICED.
Something as simple as buying my favorite snack or remembering my favorite movie may seem minor to some, but they mean a lot to me. I’ve sat across from so many guys who weren’t paying attention to who I was and were only trying to say all the right things to get me into bed and I’m over it. I want to reward the guy who listens and truly gets to know me in a real way — he deserves the same in return.
3. I TRULY VALUE THE MEANING OF A RELATIONSHIP.
I know that relationships need to be built on a foundation of trust and loyalty. The right guy for me won’t need to worry about my wandering eye or that I’m always looking for an upgrade. If he has my attention, he’s the only one who will. I haven’t found the guy who can reciprocate that quite yet but I know in my heart that he’s out there and when he finds me, our dedication to a relationship will be something to take pride in.
4. I’M COMPLETELY SECURE WITH MYSELF.
I’ve spent enough time on my own to know that no matter what happens, I’m always going to be more than okay. I’m independent and I take extreme pride in who I’ve become as a person. I’m secure with every facet of who I am and I don’t need a guy to make up for what I lack in myself, I’m already complete.
5. I’M DOMESTICATED AF FROM BOSSING MY LIFE SOLO FOR SO LONG.
When it comes to those girlfriend qualities, I’ve got it covered. I already know how to run a household, create amazing meals and take care of the adult responsibilities life handed me and I’ve been doing it for years. I won’t need my boyfriend to guide me into how to effectively be a grown up — I’ve already learned on my own.
6. I KNOW HOW TO TREAT THE MAN THAT’S FINALLY GOOD TO ME IN RETURN.
When that right guy finally comes into my world, I’m going to appreciate the hell out of him simply for the fact that it’s been so long since I’ve met a genuinely decent man who deserves my kindness. I’ve been put through the ringer by guys in my past, so when one finally sticks and gets into the crevices of my heart that haven’t been touched, I’m going to make sure he feels like royalty in my life — he’ll be my king.
7. I’M COMPLETELY HONEST WITH WHAT I WANT AND NEED FROM LIFE.
Guys often complain that women never know what they want and that we’re confusing AF, but not me — I’m a grown ass woman. I know how to ask for what I want and I won’t hesitate to go after the things that will make my life better. I’ll never be the woman who hides behind “I’m fine” or silent treatment. It’s called maturity.
8. I’M A STRONG ASS WOMAN AND I FIGHT FOR WHAT I CARE FOR.
I won’t walk away from a great love simply because stuff gets hard from time to time — that’s not how love works, despite what modern dating culture has dictated. Relationships aren’t easy but with the right guy who finally earns my heart, I’m going to work hard at ensuring our mutual happiness both in life and together.
9. I’M AN INDEPENDENT AND EQUAL PARTNER.
When I finally find that great guy to love forever, he should know that dating me means he gets an equal partner. I don’t need him to pay the bills or take care of me — we’ll take care of each other. I don’t want a good man because I need one, I’m looking for a real love and someone who stands next to me in life. I bring my own empire to the table — I don’t need his.
10. I’VE BEEN STORING UP LOVE FOR A LONG TIME NOW — THERE’S A LOT TO GIVE.
I’ve been searching for love for the past several years, but something has always held me back from it and I think in hindsight, that’s for a reason. The way that I crave and view love is unlike anything I’ve ever felt before. Maybe it’s the fact that I finally have a great deal of love for myself, or maybe it’s because the guy who finally earns my heart would have to be deserving of that infinite love to get to that place with me. For that reason, he’s going to be the luckiest guy in the world. I’ll never take him for granted. Now where the hell is he?
By Andrea Wesley for Bolde