It’s easy to get jaded about dating and throw in the towel thinking you’re just going to be single forever, anyway. Though what if I told you that while you’re worrying, your person is just around the corner waiting for you? They’re dealing with some of the same thoughts and issues you’re facing but they’re as ready for you as you are for them. Here’s what you need to remember until you find each other:
THERE REALLY IS SOMEONE OUT THERE FOR EVERYONE.
My favorite saying on this topic is that there’s a lid for every pot. In other words, there’s someone for everyone—maybe multiple someones. You don’t have to worry about all the wrong people you’ve met along the way because your person will come in due time.
Matchmaking doesn’t happen on your timetable.
I know this isn’t what you want to hear, but you can’t force something to happen when it just isn’t the right time. I mean, have you ever tried to force a relationship knowing it wasn’t right? It just doesn’t go well. I know you want a relationship NOW, but the universe works on its own timetable.
The universe has a plan for your love life.
Think about all the times you thought you knew exactly what was going to happen but then things turned out another way. That person you met was supposed to be “The One” but they ghosted you. You can try to plan and predict all you want, but the universe has a special plan for your love life. There’s someone waiting for you that’s meant to be—try not to stress in the meantime.
Your insecurities are valid but they’re also not true.
You may think that there’s something wrong with you. You worry about how you’re the last of your friends to find someone. Furthermore, your biggest fear is that you’re unlovable because you’re broken or used up. These are all completely valid fears, but they aren’t real. You’re not broken. It’s okay that you’re still single—there’s nothing wrong with that even though you’d rather reality was different. Just know you’re doing okay right now and your person is coming.
You’re perfect as you are.
It’s terribly sad that you may think there’s something inherently wrong with you due to still being single. There’s nothing intrinsically wrong with being alone, especially when you’re perfect just as you are. Just as a parent wants the best for its children, the universe wants you to have what you desire and it wants you to know you’re worth it all along the way.
Your person may be having some of the same concerns.
Imagine that future lover of yours with their head hung low, thinking about how much they’ve failed at dating. They’re also ruminating on how they think they’re worthless and they’re going to be alone forever. This is your person! Just as it hurts to think about another person—especially someone who’ll be yours—thinking this way, it’s painful for them to think about you worrying the way you are.
This person is also dealing with people who aren’t “The One.”
Think about how many mismatches two people in a couple have to face before they find each other. The path is littered with people who weren’t a match but are with each other anyway. It actually makes finding that special person even more valuable. This is going to be you. It’s going to make perfect sense to you why it didn’t work out with anyone else.
They’re waiting for you too.
Your person is also hitting the pillow at night wondering when dating is going to stop sucking. They’re thinking about how all they want is a happy relationship with an amazing woman. Take comfort in knowing that you might have to kiss a few more frogs, but your prince or princess is just around the corner.
It’s okay if you’re genuinely interested in being single forever.
There are some people who aren’t interested in finding their person. Rather, they’re set on being alone. Sometimes this may shift, but other times this remains the same. It’s totally okay if this is you—you’re not required to desire to find a person.
Not everyone has a forever person, but maybe a person who’ll be around for a while.
It’s important to note that this person that’s in your future may only be around for a certain amount of time. It’s just reality that not everyone has a forever person. Nonetheless, you will have someone in your near or far future who’s meant to be for you. They could just be around for a few years, but they’ll make a huge impact on your life, making you believe in love again.