I don’t have to be perfect for you.
Dating these days is just really complicated and strange. There’s just so much pressure for people to be perfect and to act flawlessly because otherwise, they risk missing out on the chance to spend the rest of their lives with the person that they love the most. That’s such a dramatic mindset to have going into a first date, if you really think about it. It’s crazy ridiculous. But that’s the world that we live in and the world is going to continue to turn regardless of whether love works out for us or not. But I’m not buying into that whole charade. I’m not going to stop my world; I’m not going to let my life pass me by just so I can sit and wait for “love” to walk into my life. I’ve tried my hand at love numerous times, and I’ve failed at it every single time. But that doesn’t mean I’m going to let it paralyze me into living a life of nothingness.
I know that I have something to offer to the world – to a special person if they would let me. I know myself pretty well – that’s something I’ve gotten good at considering how much time I’ve spent alone. I know what I want out of life and out of relationships. I have my expectations and I have my standards. But with this awareness, I also know what I have to offer. I know that because I can demand so many things from my ideal sense of love, I am going to give just as much of my own love back into the mix. I have clarity and I have confidence. I know what I want and I know what I don’t want. I’m not going to settle, but that doesn’t mean that I’m not willing to make a few compromises here and there either. I still believe in love because I still believe in myself.
I know what to look for; it’s just that I don’t know where to look for it. And I guess that’s the problem that a lot of us have. I’ve had my fair share of failed experiments at love and these failures have taught me valuable lessons that I continue to take with me as I traverse through the rough seas of romance. I know what to look for in a man, and I know the red flags that I need to be wary of. I know when to walk away from someone who isn’t right for me, and I also know when to be patient and to give a guy the chance to actually redeem himself. I know how petty guys can be and I know how dumb they can be as well. I understand that I can’t expect them to be mind readers and that I really have to communicate my needs properly if I expect them to be met.
I’m also fairly certain that the person I want to spend the rest of my life with is out there – and I’m not going to settle for mediocrity. I’m not going to go for a band-aid relationship just so I can say that I’m not single. That’s not the kind of person that I am. My sense of pride and self-worth doesn’t depend on whether I’m in a relationship or not. Sure, being in a relationship would be great. Who wouldn’t want that level of comfort and companionship with someone you love so dearly? But that’s the thing. It has to be founded on love; not on some fear of being single. That’s foolish.
I’m never going to rush into anything just because I’m desperate. I’m never going to let desperation affect how I go about making decisions in life and in love. I always have to let my heart and my soul lead the way – I can’t let panic infiltrate its way into my emotional core. I have to be sound and true to what I feel. And I’m never going to be afraid of walking away from something that isn’t right for me. I have mastered the art of detachment. A lot of people don’t understand that detachment is important and attachment is unhealthy. You should never be “attached” to someone else. You should live your own life, and find someone who is willing to accommodate you in theirs.
But to top it all off, I know that the best things in life aren’t those that are forced. The best things that this world has to offer are all the natural beauties and wonders that exist. And while the perfect one for me may not be here yet, I have no doubt that he is out there. So it’s okay if you and I didn’t end up working out in the end. The universe has a way of leading us to places where we’re exactly supposed to be.