Don’t do it, just don’t.
Human beings are inherently nostalgic. That’s just a fact of life. It becomes even more magnified whenever you feel particularly sad or vulnerable. Whenever human beings get stuck in compromising or unfortunate situations, they will look to the past for a reminder of happiness and joy. In this case, you are currently in a relationship with someone. You thought you had completely moved on from your ex, but here you are, you’re currently discontented with the state of things and you think you want to go back to your old lover. Are your feelings legitimate or are they just a figment of your imagination?
Remember that you always have to be able to maintain a sense of skepticism when it comes to your feelings. You can’t be so trusting of your emotions because they can often betray you. You have to be logical when it comes to the decisions that you make in life. So in case you feel like you want to return to your ex, just really take the time to think about it. Don’t act on it right away. Remember that it may just be your heart playing its games with you.
To help enlighten you further, here are a few reasons as to why you don’t really want to get back together with your ex. It’s a bad idea and you should resist it.
1. You are only craving for familiarity, but not your ex.
Right now, you are stuck in a precarious situation. You seem lost, unhappy, and discontented. You don’t know what to do. You want a sense of structure and order back in your life. But you have to understand that you don’t have to find that in your previous relationships. Sure, there is a sense of familiarity there, but that doesn’t mean that your ex is the only option.
2. You are only focusing on all the good times and you blind yourself from the bad.
The past only seems tempting now because you are only looking at all the good parts. You are probably forgetting all the fights and disagreements. You are probably forgetting about all of the awkward silences. You are forgetting about all the terrible dates and bad nights in bed. You are forgetting about all of the reasons that you broke up in the first place. If you are going to reminisce about the past, make sure you remember all of it; not just the good parts. A part of being able to move on in life is learning from your previous mistakes. Don’t get caught in a vicious cycle of bad decisions.
3. You just feel vulnerable and lonely.
Make sure that whenever you make a life-altering decision, you aren’t doing so out of desperation. When you are deciding on the fate of your romantic life, then you have to make sure that it comes from a place of rationality and logical thinking. If it comes from being overly emotional, then maybe you shouldn’t be too rash or hasty in your decision making. Take all the time that you need to seriously think about how you’re feeling and what you want to get out of life.
4. You’re just acting irrationally jealous and territorial.
Sometimes, you don’t really want your ex back. You just can’t handle the thought that someone you once used to “own” is now with someone else. You are going to have to forget about it. For starters, you never owned your ex. You can’t own another person. You are just a little insecure about the fact that your ex has found love elsewhere. You are just going to have to accept that the both of you have to move on to better things in life without each other.
5. You’re a different person now than you were back then.
Just because you fell in love with your ex once doesn’t mean that you’re going to fall in love again. Remember, things didn’t turn out alright for the both of you. You are a much different person now than you were before. You have grown and evolved. You can even bet on the fact that you’ve probably outgrown each other and that’s a good thing.
6. You can’t be so quick to give up on the promise of the future.
You’re never going to find stability and happiness in the future if you keep going back to the past. Have faith that the future has great things in store for you. Let happiness come into your life in a natural manner. Don’t force things.
7. You won’t find happiness in the past.
You don’t have to succumb to the thinking that your happiness is purely dependent on getting back together with your ex. You have to understand that happiness can be found anywhere so as long as you have the patience to wait for it to show itself to you. Just because you were happy once before doesn’t mean that you’re not going to be happy anywhere else.
By A for RelationshipRules