1. Chew This Gum For Me, Baby
I have some fairly pronounced jaw muscles, probably because I grind my teeth while I sleep? Anyways it would really turn my gf on when I would flex them. She would usually offer me a piece of gum before sexy time she liked it so much. She would send me nudes and I’d send videos of me chewing gum…
2. The First Rule Of Gun Safety
Definitely the “fuck me with your pistol” request. It had to be a real gun because a fake gun wouldn’t be “real danger”. I declined because the first rule of gun safety is to not put guns in your girlfriend.
3. No True Scotsman
I dated a girl who wanted me to use an aggressive Scottish accent when I fucked her.
I’m an actor. So I did it.
It was hot, no lie.
4. She Even Wore A Collar
This chick wanted to be my slave. She would wear a collar, and leash, and just sit in the corner to be used. No cuddling or she would leave. I was supposed to go about my day at home, and when I wanted pleasure I would call her, and she would do whatever I demanded. Mostly would just play games and get blown. Once I did the dishes and got a bj… My roommate was not happy. But the dishes were done.
5. The Fetish that really sticks with you
Branding fetish using lighters. 0/10, do not recommend.
6. Easiest 80 bucks ever
I have a friend who used to be a Dominatrix…once she was paid $80 to meet a guy in a parking lot and point and laugh at him for five minutes.
Dream jobs do exist.
7. Is She asleep is she pretending?
I used to see a girl who really liked me fucking her while she was asleep. The way it worked is we would have sex once or twice like normal, she would fall asleep, and then I would either stay up and fuck her in the middle of the night or before she woke up in the morning. I was never sure if she actually slept through the first few minutes, or she was just faking being asleep because the fantasy turned her on.
8. Bomb Popsicle
Fucking my ex with a bomb popsicle (the red, white, and blue ones).
9. Expansion Fetish
To talk dirty about how my body is inflating while he fucks me. Obviously, my body wasn’t actually inflating, but I sure pretended it was. I love this man, odd fetish and all.
If there are any breast/butt/stomach expansion/inflation/whathaveyou fetishists out there that can give me some tips on this I’d really appreciate it.
10. Felt Bad Doing It
One time this fellow I met online and hooked up with just wanted me to insult his tiny penis while he jacked off. I felt really bad doing it because I hate saying bad things about penises, no matter how small they are, but I did it because he really, really wanted it.
11. The Best Medicine
To laugh into her mouth. Like, as if we were french kissing, but she opened her mouth wider and I laughed into it.
12. Meeow
A guy I had been on 3-4 dates with left me a voice mail asking if I would dress up as a cat for him. He wanted me to fully act like a cat as well. Said, “I can’t wait to hear you purr.” He ended up dumping me for my best friend before I could dump him… juuuuust realized it’s probably cause she dressed as a sexy cat for Halloween that year…
13. V For Vendetta Meets Kidnapping
My boyfriend has a massive obsession with the Guy Fawkes masks. V for Vendetta is his favorite movie. He has three different ones. He wears one to every cosplay.
Now, I’ve always had a kidnapping/rape fantasy, but even when he first said he wanted to wear the mask during sex I was a tad weirded out. Then we got the idea to put the two ideas together.
I felt like I was in a sick and twisted movie. There was whips and restraints. There was forced oral. I ended up loving everything about it and I can safely say that I actually prefer it with the mask.
14. Smucker’s Magic Shell
In high school I had a unique girlfriend who wanted me to place my erect penis into a cup of ice water so that it would become cold enough for her to pour Smucker’s Magic Shell sauce on it and give me a blow job.
15. She Was Just Curious
To put my toes in her vagina. “I wanna know what it feels like.” This only happened once, and nothing about feet has ever come up since. We had a good run…
16. Filthy Panties
Wife called me into bathroom as she was getting ready for work. She started a handjob out of no where. As I’m about to finish she pulls her panties out and finishes me into the panties she is wearing. Puts on her pants and goes to work.
17. Alright, let’s keep this clean
He wanted me to pee on him. I let out a few drops until he started yelling “oh god no, not here, in the shower.” Yeah, I’m the weird one for not knowing where to do this.
18. THe Oddest and saddest request
My wife never wants to be penetrated. She told me this after 3 years, for all those 3 years she would get lingering pain for a few days after every single time, and just thought that thats how it was for every girl (i was her first). Yes she’s been to doctor, tried almost all the different birth controls, still gets the pain.
So I guess the oddest request was that she only suck my dick for the rest of my life.
19. Sneeze In My Pussy
A few.
Put your nose on my pussy and sneeze. Girl would never tell me if she was serious or not.
After blowing me girls said she wanted me to be her side piece. Not all that weird I guess it just seemed odd at the time.
Ex anal. She was ass shy as hell sober, right amount of alcohol and her ass practically inhaled dick.
20. Had To Run Because He Couldn’t Get Enough
A guy wanted to eat out my asshole “until the sun came up” I honestly don’t get any type of feeling from this and it was boring as hell, and weird for me. I literally had to run from his room because he wouldn’t stop eating my asshole.
21. “I’m No Mike Tyson”
Mid bone I was told to punch her in the face.
When I did not comply I was called a pussy.
I’m a pussy.
It was a closed fist punch to the cheek she wanted. I can be a bad boy sometimes but I’m no Mike Tyson.
—deleted
22. …Just Go
I had to pee and my husband blocked the bathroom door and kindly ask me to just go in my pants.
I have a new fetish.
23. Issues Of Gender
I was in a relationship for a time, with a guy, that liked me to wear a sports bra, and men’s boxers while he fucked me in the bum.
He was quite open about the whole issues of gender, and he used to get annoyed if I didn’t dress in an overtly feminine way. He had an expression “dress like a boy, and I’ll fuck you like a boy”
24. That Escalated Quickly
Had an ex who was an extreme prude and very difficult in the bedroom; like, she wouldn’t even spoon if I was aroused at all, demanded a full body massage before even considering going further, etc. Just no fun to be with at all.
Then she asks me, flat out, to rape her, and also to bring along some friends when I do it.
Nooooooooooooope.
25. Closet Gay Man Is Totally Not Gay
I dated a man who was super afraid of being accused of being gay. He was really mad when I cut my long hair into a pixie cut and refused to fuck me from behind from that day forth. That also meant no butt stuff ever because even heterosexual butt stuff was “Hella gay.”
This same man once called me begging me to come over saying he had a special treat for me. When I got there he was taking a bath and was super horny. He asked me if I wanted to try something new. When I said yes he directed me to bring him the plunger, it had a clear plastic handle with big bumpy finger grips. He told me he had been putting it in his own butt for an while and now he wanted me to be in control. Not only is that super weird but totally against his own beliefs.
Welp, I still did it for him, he was pissy and told me he fucked him own ass with a plunger better then I did. Also he still never gave me butt stuff.
26. Getting The Chores Done
I once convinced my then-boyfriend I was extremely aroused by watching him do the dishes. It lasted about 3 weeks. That was a good 3 weeks.
27. Call me Mother
An older woman (twice my age) that I was seeing at the time insisted that I refer to her as my mother.
28. A Gentleman Can Only Go So Far
She wanted me to bite her nipples hard. I obliged. She said harder. I tried. She screamed for me to bite them harder. I cried and went limp.
29. Marshmallow Fluff
My BF wanted to spice things up a bit, but didn’t really offer a lot of suggestions. So one night we were laying in bed watching tv, and I went to the kitchen. I thought the idea of something warm and squishy would be great – always thought food sex sounded fun.
I warmed up a large bowl of marshmallow Fluff in the microwave and got a big spoon. Went back to bed and sat quietly, until he looked over and said, “What’s that?” I took a spoon full of warm Fluff and dribbled it down my chest. He went to grab some, and I took a handful and splattered his chest with it also. It was a free-for-all.
We ended up with it everywhere, laughing our asses off. We rolled off the bed and onto the floor, me on top of him, the both of us giggling like idiots. Finally I lifted myself up – but OUCH – the warm Fluff had hardened a bit, and my boobs were stuck to his chest hair. OUCHCHCHCHCHCHC….. slowly trying to rip apart from him, as I pulled his hairs out. “AAAAAAAAAHH!” he screamed. We tried to roll to our sides…. but NOOOOOO his back hair was stuck to the carpet. He started screaming in pain.
It took a very, very, very long time to get unglued from each other and the carpet. We both had red welts on our skin, and he had noticeable bald spots on his chest and back. Never EVER again. Ever. Never.
30. Cupcake Princess
“Go down on mean while I eat a fancy cupcake.” Ok, you pretty princess.
This was back in the days when cupcakes in NYC were all the rage. Fuck outta here with your cronuts or whatever. Wasn’t the oddest thing I’ve ever done, but a unique request!
31. Crime, Not Punishment
That I read her Dostoevsky while she was giving me head.
32. Such Lovely Feet
Almost every man I’ve been with has asked me to pleasure him with my feet. I’ve always been told that I have nice feet even though I don’t do anything special to them.
33. Murdery And Creepy
Probably the guy who asked me to dress in a latex nun costume wearing a fake pregnancy belly. Or maybe that’s second to the guy who wanted me to stab him and drink the blood.
All depends on whether your definition of “oddest” is more on the whimsical-but-impractical side or the murdery-and-creepy side. Either way, I did not indulge either fantasy. I’m all for getting weird, but man, those were both a little beyond me.
34. A Request About The Future
Not really a sexual request, but mid sex, this girl asks me “so where do you feel this is going? What am I to you?” Needless to say I INSTANTLY lost my erection.
35. “But, but when should i stop?!”
I had a huge crush on this girl in first year university. She was this very cute blonde, had a girl next door thing going on.
All year we would flirt innocently, a smile here, a joke there. I had a girlfriend at the start of school so I never really pressed for more than a bit of light flirting.
Fast forward to the end of the year and I am a single man. I had been enjoying my freedom when one night I bump into blondie while walking back to res. We get to talking and it’s the old “how come nothing every happened between us” conversation that always goes in the predictable direction of the bedroom.
So we are back at hers and start having sex. Right away she is a bit more aggressive than I would have expected based on my naive prejudice (oh the folly of youth to think that an innocent looking girl was actually innocent). Suffice it to say, it was a pleasant surprise.
She starts asking for things to get rough and being a considerate lover I comply. Things keep ramping up and she tells me to choke her. Alrighty. So I’m choking her, and as we go on she asks for it harder and harder.
Eventually I’m squeezing pretty fucking hard and I’m a little worried I might actually hurt her (I’m 6’1, 230 and she was like 5,3 and hardly over 100 lbs).
So the next time she says harder I say “how will I know when to stop?” Essentially asking for a safe word or something.
To which she replies “I’ll be dead.”
36. Penis Mold
To make a mold of my penis so she can use it to give me anal. True fucking story.
37. Weirdly Soothing
My last partner wanted me to nuzzle his penis, like just rub my face against it. It wasn’t bad, I didn’t mind, his hygiene was on point, it was just a weird request the first time. He also liked me to lay my head on his thighs and lazily give him head while talking about my day. Neither request was unpleasant but no one had ever asked before. I actually liked the lacksidaisical blowjob, it was weirdly soothing.
38. A Simple Misunderstanding
Having grown up with access to both the Internet and the slew of misinformation that it popularized, I spent most of my adolescence with the mistaken assumption that if one girl liked a particular thing, then all of them did. It was a monumentally stupid perspective… and one of which I wasn’t cured until I was about twenty years old, when I met a young woman who not only noticed my ineptitude, but made it her personal mission to cure me of it.
Needless to say, I was only too eager to accept her help.
The one problem with having a relationship (of any variety) that’s based on sex, though, is the fact that most of its content will be somewhat graphic in nature. The girl and I conversed almost exclusively about various positions, fetishes, tactics, and tricks, with our only deviations from those topics coming about when we were trying to plan another encounter. I didn’t mind, of course… but neither did I notice that she and I were abysmally bad at communicating with one another.
One evening, as we were discussing the prospect of spending the night together, the young woman made a suggestion to me. I had answered her phone call with my usual air of interest, only to have her immediately launch into a rather provocative proposal.
“I want,” she said to me, her breathing audible over the receiver, “to come over right now.”
“Sounds good!” I replied. “We can…”
“I want,” the girl interrupted, “to walk in, not say anything to each other, and go right to your bedroom.” I held my tongue that time, and she continued. “I want to yank off your pants, go down on you… and you’ll growl like a mouse.”
Now, that may seem like an odd request, but the young woman and I had been discussing the way that moans (and other vocalizations) could add to the atmosphere of arousal. I wasn’t entirely sure how a mouse was supposed to growl, mind you, but I figured that the idea was to make it seem like I was both submissive and satisfied.
It wasn’t long before I heard a knock at my door, rushed to open it, and found the girl waiting there with a hungry look in her eye. She stepped inside, pulled me toward my bedroom, then immediately set about removing my belt. I was naked below the waist only a second or two later, and allowing myself to be shoved backwards onto my bed.
As soon as the girl started in on her part of the plan, I threw myself into mine.
“Gweeeeeek!” I whimpered. “Hrrrrroooweeeeeek!”
With a look of utter incredulity on her face, the young woman stared up at me. “What are you doing?”
“I’m, uh…” I stammered. “I’m growling like a mouse? Isn’t that what you wanted?”
“What?”
“On the phone!” I quickly explained. “You said you wanted me to growl like a mouse!”
“No, I definitely didn’t,” the girl replied.
Panic gripped me for a moment. Had I been tricked by someone masquerading as my partner in casual sex? If so, how had they known that she’d be showing up?
“Okay, well…” I said, hoping to salvage the situation, “what did you want?”
The young woman kept staring at me for a moment, then burst out into uncontrollable laughter. “I wanted,” she sputtered, tears of mirth coming to her eyes, “to come over here, avoid talking, go down on you, and have you grow in my mouth!”
Fortunately, we were both able to laugh off the situation and have an otherwise enjoyable evening… but for the rest of the time that the girl and I were acquainted, she would often tease me by talking about growling rodents.
39. “She Scared Me”
We were mid doggy style and she said “Choke me from behind until I pass out. Then keep going and finish inside me, I want to wake up with a mess oozing out.”
We didn’t date long, she scared me…
40. 0/10
One night stand with a black guy. Asked me to say, “Fuck me n####r.” I did it. 0/10, would never do it again.
41. Eeeeeek
“Can we record this? I want to show it to my husband later.”
By Lisa Woods for ThoughCatalog