Ever wonder what he’s thinking when he’s looking at you in THAT way? Every female has and when they happen to ask their date, he just casually brushes it off… Believe me, he’s thinking and observing you, but he doesn’t want you to know because he can use it later on to show how attentive he is, if he wants to.
Males have mastered the evasive maneuvers for inquisitive questions as they watch and learn things about you, you probably didn’t know about yourself. The first thing to state is that, males are very observant and about the physical. Any changes can indicate a different mood or feeling that he will need to be aware of. The second thing that is very important to remember is that, males are very emotional creatures. This might sound strange because most people think females are the more tender gender, but history and entertainment has proven that the drama queens are actually emo kings. The rowdy ones, those struggling to find self-expression, the ones who end up in the news or writing the best love songs… are all males.
So, after chatting with several guys who are actively dating women and others, I got a good scope of 15 things men pay attention to but you don’t. Enjoy!
15. How much MEAT you eat
“I like it when my girl eats meat. Makes me feel comfortable at being myself.”
“I don’t like dating a girl who makes me feel fat or like a pig.”
Men notice what women eat on dates and what they snack on during their time together. Most guys feel like a girl who isn’t afraid of showing off their eating habits, however strange they might be, is a girl who is confident and fun to be around. On dates, it’s normal for girls to want to look good and keep a composed appearance, but instead of just having that garden salad so that you appear healthy and aware of your weight and health, go for the fish or chicken options if you don’t want the red meat. Order the tasty, good, and not too expensive entrees that have your date feeling like he’s eating with a person and not a rabbit. Don’t go all out and order the most expensive item on the menu. Just be aware that he wants to know you are confident and secure in your skin, able to take care of yourself and eat meat.
14. How much MAKEUP you wear
“I like it when she wears makeup. Drives me nuts!”
I’m not sure when it happened, but a lot of men equate women wearing makeup as them putting in effort to look good for their date. So, when a girl is dressed down, makeup free, and in sweats, males feel a bit put off, as if they’re not worth the up-do. I blame films and television shows for this because, when a girl is getting ready for a date, she always takes a shower, moisturizes, does her hair, and applies makeup. IT doesn’t matter what channel or genre of film, Disney Channel and Nickelodeon show the same ideas that is aired on HBO and Showtime. Women in entertainment are always shown on the red carpet fully made up in stunning gowns. When they are caught in public without makeup and in sweats, they are practically unrecognizable. So, somehow, men have gotten it into their minds that, if they are worth the hassle and trouble, hours of effort, their woman will do it for them. As if it directly reflects how much their woman cares for and treasures them.
13. Beverage preference
“Water during dinner, red wine with steak, a Gin and tonic with work friends, and white wine when she needs to vent her problems.”
If you think men watch how much we eat, you can be sure they know what we drink. It’s not even funny how much they learn our beverages in accordance to who we are with and how we feel. Most of the guys, apparently, do this so that they can order for their dates, but some do it because they find the type of drink consumed directly correlates with the mood of their date and tells how the night will end. I’ve heard guys compare notes on how the different drinks affect their ladies, laughing about the similarities and trading notes and recommendations. Overall, men want to know what we put in our bodies because they care about how it affects our moods and, especially when they are around, what we want to do. And, though every woman is different, most alcohols have similar effects on all of us if we have enough.
12. A color you often wear
“I like to wear black and white because it goes with everything she wears.”
This was funny to hear a guy admit, but then, females wear such ranges of color, it’s only natural that a man should want to match his girl the best he can. It’s true that women often wear many colors and often wear what their mood takes them. The guy who wrote this quote is with a particularly trendy girl who likes to keep up with the latest trends in Tokyo and London. Her outfits are usually quite wild in colors and very outspoken. She’s daring and enjoys being so open about her tastes. Which is how she attracted a boyfriend who wears solid colors. This is normal because men are often attracted by the woman’s appearance. The more she can wear her personality, the more personality she must have, is the assumption. Not only is it in the color of the clothes, but also the fashions and trends. Your date will notice what you wear and dress to match. And when he does, be sure to compliment him. It shows that he cares!
11. Clean nails or nail polish
“I ask her to paint her nails. And she did it for me.”
Somehow, this is one idea that men find proof that women listen to them. I’m not sure when it started that guys want proof that women listen, but it has taken into effect in various ways, shapes, and form. One, of which, comes in the form of nail polish. Whether it’s to show off a woman’s femininity, nails, or taste in colors, the fact remains that, if your man asks you to do something and you do it, you earn gold stars. If you don’t do it, it’s considered a small slight to their masculinity, how you view them, and what he won’t hope for from you in the future. It’s always cute when a guy requests something of their girls. Appearance-wise, it’s a bit daring but if you can pull it off, do it with flare and show him that you do listen, you do care, and that you do know how to strut your stuff even if not by choice.
10. Activities you enjoy more than others
“Her personality comes out when we go surfing.”
Some guys enjoy challenging their dates to see how far they will go for them. It’s a strange concept and, yes, I find it a bit unnerving to know that guys pay attention to how you take the athletics in their relationship, but they want to see what you will do and how far out of your comfort-zone you’re willing to go for them. They will suggest hiking and take you on a wilderness trail or they will suggest going to the beach and bring surf boards or rent kayaks. The fact of the matter is, he wants to know your physical capabilities so he can observe, make notes, and suggest things that you will enjoy more. Not all dates are about the movies, dinners, and long walks. Why not jump on bikes and ride around the city together, enjoying the sunlight and breeze, maybe even racing a little to show off your competitive edge? While having fun and laughing, he’s watching and taking mental notes, thinking of more fun ways to enjoy time together.
9. Your smile
“I just want to make her smile. She has an unforgettable smile.”
Most men, when asked about the most memorable thing about first meeting their girlfriends, will say it was their smile. That one small attribute on everyone’s face captures hearts, makes new friends, and can render the right partner to a puddle of goop when used correctly. Smiles are a friendly and flirty way to greet someone new or old. The best way to show happiness and excitement is through a smile. Even a half-hearted smile can make some knees weak. So brush your teeth, floss, and add some gloss to your lips! As the welcome mat to any conversation or the greeting banner before anyone tries to get closer, it’s the smile men like to see. It’s the smile men want to work for. It’s that smile that men take the first step and initiate contact, hoping the woman behind the smile is as brilliant and sweet as the smile is. Some men are disappointed to find vacant black holes, but most men are rewarded with twinkling eyes, sparkling conversation, and a charming personality.
8. Your facial expressions
“Even before she says anything, I can tell what she needs to hear.”
Apart from smiles and crying, the face is of the most expressive parts of the body. It can express surprise and disappointment with just the furrowing or raising of the brow. It can express cold or physical attraction with biting a bottom lip. It can lead to a beautiful connection between two people or expel a rejection from the same set of lips. When men get to know their women, one of the first things they learn are her facial expressions. Knowing how to read the woman means knowing what she wants before she asks, what she needs to hear before she speaks, and being able to anticipate her needs so as to better prove himself a great companion to her. It’s the unspoken connection and mystery men enjoy that makes them feel even more irreplaceable when they get it right. Learning those facial expressions, or “looks”, women have is their way of proving that they pay attention and understand you.
7. Your “quirks”
“I like it when she’s different… and proud of it.”
When given options in life, there’s usually an obvious choice and a road less traveled. Most of the time, most people choose the obvious choice. Every now and then, someone will take the road less traveled. Even more rare are those who choose to blaze their own path and make their own choice or road. It’s that quirkiness, that little extra bit of personality, that men love and adore in their women. It’s hard to say what it is in each woman, but it is different in every woman. Some women have a snarkier sense of humor that some men find irresistible. All women range in levels of organized, but some women live in organized chaos. And some men love that. Most women have quirks that keep them with the rest of the group, whereas; some women have quirks that set them aside from the rest. What’s important is for every woman to be themselves and live life the way they want to, or see best. If a man happens to like it, more power to them!
6. Musical preferences
“Listening to her sing off key makes the song even better.”
Most people are consistently listening to music, whether it be from their radios, phones, players, and etc. Almost every establishment plays music, and it’s mostly because it creates a more relaxed atmosphere that more people can enjoy. Men notice what type of music their women likes. It’s not a big secret that music can tell a lot about our personalities and preferences. But when a woman feels comfortable enough to sing along, men notice this. Sometimes, men will purposefully play more music their woman likes, just to hear her sing or see her nod along to the beat. It’s a small sign of consideration that can progress a relationship faster or slow things down. Similar tastes in music can bring a couple closer together, knowing they have more things in common. Different tastes in music can also bring a couple closer together, because one will want to share with the other, hoping to convert them as well. This type of behavior, in general, increases the connection and betters the chemistry between two people.
5. What troubles you
“She doesn’t like cats. I don’t ask why. We don’t watch The Lion King either.”
Perhaps, the most common response I got was that men know when their woman is upset or troubled. Some men claim the air around their woman is just different from usual, which helps him figure out what to do next. Some men say that their woman just gives off the feeling, which often will change their plans and force the man to act like a wide receiver; waiting to catch the ball. All in all, an attentive man will notice when their woman is troubled, in any degree, and try to help solve the issue or problem, in the hopes that their woman will feel better. Whether it be cramps or a problem in life, men want to be there for their woman. If the man feels like their woman is mad at them, that changes things and the man will, usually, change into pacifying-mode, with flowers, kisses, and maybe candy. Men might miss the big things, but they are attentive to the moods of women. The waters are tough without navigation!
4. What perks you up
“When she is happy, I am miles in the air.”
Men love it when their woman is happy! Everyone wants to be happy! When a man first meets a woman, if there is mutual chemistry, both parties are happy! If both are happy, then both will smile! This is of the most beautiful things in the world! Whatever it is, men always notice when their woman is happy. I once knew a guy who never touched plants. He couldn’t understand why anyone would want to touch “naturally germ-infested lifeforms”. And then he met an artist who presses and dries plants in their art. To this day, he has a backyard full of various plants, all of which he plucks for her to use for her art. THAT is love! To face their fears, challenges, and other obstacles head on, for the sake of being together, men will do very interesting things for their woman. They see the small details and they feel as if they are privy to the information, which makes it all the more special and cherished.
3. Body changes
“I can always tell when she’s stressed…”
This might seem a bit superficial, but hear me out. Men notice changes in their woman more than women usually do in themselves. It’s a funny thought, but men see their woman differently. They observe more, remember and memorize features others would simply overlook. I remember once when my man pointed out to me a sun spot I never knew I had on my left arm. It had developed over time, but I hadn’t noticed until he pointed it out to me. Imagine my surprise! But he noticed from the moment it appeared. And, when he did, he’d started insisting on driving so that my left arm could spend more time out of the sun. I thought it was sweet and quite chivalrous at the time, and looking back, I realized that he was trying to keep me from growing more for my health. It’s a silly thing, but it shows how much he cares. Men will engrave their woman in their minds and notice the slightest changes. It could be a small change or a big change, the important part is, they notice and try to help regardless, which is quite sweet.
2. Body language
Nothing speaks louder to men than the body language of their woman. Although every woman is a bit different, most women share similar poses for happiness, sadness, anger, and stress. From there, the variations increase, but are generally along the same ideas. Men learn the body language of their women and commit them to memory to best reciprocate or respond when they see it. From my findings, most men are always checking in to make sure they are reading correctly. Not only do they have to read the body language, but they check in verbally for confirmation, before trying to administer any responses of their own. As most people know, body language can communicate a great deal without words. In the same way, body language can be completely mute or confusing. It takes someone very caring to read body language and respond appropriately.
1. Need vs. Want
We’re always talking on and on about what we want, what we wish we had, and what we hope to one day be successful enough to own in our own right. Men listen and understand that these are the fantasies we’re talking about, letting things cloud our better judgement and see only what we want to see. And they amuse us by getting us trinkets, bobs of gifts, flowers, but when it comes down to it, they watch what we spend money on and when we ask for their opinion, they are careful in the delivering of their answer. They understand that money is precious and should be used for the important stuff, so they look for ways to make sure we’re not just wasting it away on something frivolous. Instead, they try to help us save money so that when it comes time to buying something we need, we have it. Sometimes, without realizing what we need, they get it for us out of the kindness of their heart, because they care that much. Isn’t that sweet?
By TIFFANY CHAI for TheTalko