My husband and I went from first date to married in just eight weeks. Deciding to get married took just five. I have never been one for cliché sayings, but sometimes, they are what they are for a reason: When you know, you really do just know.
When my husband and I started hanging out, I knew our relationship was totally unique. It just felt different… and I wasn’t sure why. Now that we’ve been married for a few months, with the whirlwind slowing down, I am better able to see just how things are different with him than they were with other men.
When you meet the man whom you’ll want to marry, you’ll feel all kinds of new and different things. It’s these feelings that’ll make you realize just how special he is. Below, you’ll find just some of the things you may feel when you’ve found the man you should marry.
1. You’ll Feel Surprised A Guy Like Him Even Exists
Though my husband and I attended the same high school, we barely knew each other. Fast forward 13 years, and, while both visiting our hometown as adults, we decided to meet up for coffee on a whim. Right after that first hangout, I drove home completely stunned at the connection I’d just felt.
Now that I’m married, I still find myself completely startled that a man like him, just right for me in every way, even exists. When you meet the man you should marry, you’ll be surprised that there’s someone like him in your life.
Everything you thought you knew about relationships will seem wrong, and before you know it, you’ll realize what you’ve been missing this whole time.
2. You’ll Feel Completely Comfortable In Your Own Skin
I have some of the worst habits in the world.
I’m cranky as hell if I get woken up before I’m ready, I eat cold veggie dogs dipped in hummus (which is completely disgusting), I’m fiercely independent to the point that I don’t let people help me out, and I tend to internalize everything and anything.
Despite all of those “bad” personal habits, I feel totally comfortable being myself around my husband. It’s not that he doesn’t know about those personality traits of mine (at least now he certainly does). Instead, it’s that he loves and accepts me anyway. He doesn’t look beyond those traits, he just gets that they are part of what makes me… well, me.
When you meet the man you’ll end up marrying, you’ll feel glad that you can be yourself, and still feel his love and acceptance no matter what.
3. You’ll Feel Attracted To Him All The Time
I’m not trying to brag, but my husband is hot.
He’s tall, with blonde hair and blue eyes, and because of all his years playing rugby, he’s got an athlete’s body that won’t quit. That said, even if he objectively wasn’t the best looking guy in the world, I’d still be attracted to him all the time for plenty of other reasons.
When you meet the man you’re going to marry, you’ll feel like you can’t get enough of him.
Whether he’s sleepily looking at you, trying to form words over his morning coffee, or strutting around the beach in perfectly-fitting swim trunks, you’ll want to get your hands on him (and keep ’em there forever).
4. You’ll Feel Like You Can Work Anything Out Without A Fight
If I had to pick, I’d say I’m a fighter more than I am a lover. I decided to go to law school because I like arguing so much. In my prior relationships, this was a skill I valued. I told myself it was just passion, but in reality, I liked to fight — a lot.
When I was dating my husband, all the useless fighting slipped away. When one of us was bothered by something, we talked about it like grownups. We showed our love first.
In the relationship with the man you’ll marry, you’ll feel like fighting is a useless waste of time. You’ll be able to work things out without the need for fights and petty arguments.
5. You’ll Feel Like He Truly Cherishes You
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My husband makes me feel like I’m a walking miracle all the time.
While I often joke about how corny he is, I actually love it. He makes me feel like I’m the best thing that ever happened to him.
When you meet the man you’re going to marry, you won’t wonder how he feels about you.
He’ll make it clear that you are incredibly special to him.
6. You’ll Feel Like His Little Quirks Are More Adorable Than Irritating
I have not, historically, been that good at relationships. I really like my own independence, and most of all, I get irritated by things easily.
All that changed when I met my husband.
I find almost everything he does to be charming. Moments that would typically bother me, like leaving socks on the floor or leftovers on the table, don’t get to me. Now, they just make me laugh.
It’s different because they’re coming from him, the perfect guy for me.
7. You’ll Feel Like He Shares Your Vision Of The Future
My husband and I have totally different backgrounds.
In high school, he played sports, while I was a nerd. I went straight to law school after college, and he took some time deciding what he wanted to do with his life. Now, I like to spend my Wednesday nights holed up with books. My husband, on the other hand, spends his Wednesday nights playing pick-up rugby.
Even though where we came from is different, where we’re going is the same. When you meet your future husband, you’ll feel like you see the future in the exact same way. Ultimately, you’ll want the same things despite any differences.
8. You’ll Feel Like Your Relationship Is Sacred
My husband and I make our marriage a priority. When we feel like we’re spending too much of our energy elsewhere, work or otherwise, we make it a point to recenter ourselves and nourish our marriage.
Even before we got married, we knew we wanted to focus a lot of time on just us. We continued to put our relationship first, which is something I had never done in my prior relationships.
Even if you were the type to put others’ needs ahead of your own, when you meet “the one,” you’ll want to make emotional space for your guy and your relationship. They’ll both feel extremely sacred to you.
9. You’ll Feel Like You Can Talk About Anything
I feel like I can talk to my husband about just about anything: my view on monogamy, the weather, what we’re doing over the weekend, politics… you name it. This didn’t come from being married. It was because I could talk to him about anything that I wanted to marry him. Even before I said, “I do,” talking to him felt like the easiest thing in the world.
In a relationship with the man you’ll end up married to, you’ll know you can be open about everything. Your views and beliefs won’t cause problems or lead to conflict.
10. You’ll Feel Like Everything Just Fits Into Place
The truth is, when you meet the guy you’re going to marry, things will just feel like they fell into place. Before I met my husband, not only was I not looking for a relationship, I actively didn’t want a relationship. I wasn’t even sure about the whole marriage thing in the first place.
Maybe you aren’t relationship-oriented, even if someone does sweep you off your feet. If you’re like me, that man may begin to change how you feel. And when you meet the guy, it’ll all just fit. You’ll be thrilled to spend forever with him.
Meeting the man you want to be with for the rest of your life is exciting and overwhelming. More importantly, though, it’s different. It’s a unique feeling and a natural, internal knowledge that you’re with the right guy for you. And usually, when you know, you just know.
Bonus Feelings You’ll Have, According To Relationship Experts
However, sometimes, even if a relationship is happy, healthy, and able to go the distance, you may not “just know” you’re going to marry your partner from the moment you meet them. And that’s OK. It may take a little more introspection on your part to really be sure that your partner is the one you should marry.
If you’ve read through the feelings on this list time and time again, and you still feel like you’re just not sure, Elite Daily spoke to four more experts to identify other subtle things you’ll feel that indicate your partner is your forever person.
You’ll Feel Excited About Your Relationship And The Future
A relationship with someone you can see yourself marrying is one you should feel genuinely excited about, as the future relationship you always fantasized about suddenly feels more realistic with this person. “You can start envisioning your future home, children, and whatever you’ve dreamed about in the past about what your future looks like,” says matchmaker and dating expert Stef Safran, of Stef and the City.
According to her, the excitement and anticipation you feel about the future will likely even spill over to your “everyday mood.” “If you see the future with excitement, that’s definitely on the right track to marriage,” she says.
You’ll Feel At Peace
While being in a healthy, long-term relationship is an exciting feeling, you’ll still feel a general sense of peace in your relationship when you’ve found the person you should marry, as if any doubts you had about your future and about this person’s feelings for you have drifted away.
“After the infatuation fades (and it does, on average, after 12 to 18 months), you’ll feel calm,” Anita Chlipala, LMFT, founder of Chicago-based relationship therapy firm Relationship Reality 312, tells Elite Daily. “There’s no uncertainty about your man’s feelings for you because you know he loves and adores you. He’s consistent with his affection and leaves no doubt in your mind.”
You’ll Feel A Sense Of Relief
“When you feel that you have someone who cares for you the way you care for them, you feel relief and hopefully a lot of happiness,” says Safran. While you don’t need a spouse to “save” you by any means, if you’re meant to be with someone forever, you’ll feel “comforted that this person is really there and cares for you like you care for them.”
You’ll Feel Like You Don’t Have To Pretend — About Anything
At the beginning of a relationship, it’s natural to put up a bit of a front, or at least to want to put your best foot forward. However, continuously altering your interests, your feelings, and your personality in hopes of seeming perfect and making a relationship work is not sustainable forever. And when you’re with someone you could marry one day, you won’t feel like you have to alter anything about yourself.
“You can stop trying to pretend you like watching football, wearing makeup to bed, [or] admitting that you like to watch Reality TV nonstop during Christmas,” says Safran. “You feel like this person does accept you for not being perfect and having quirks.”
You’ll Feel An Incredible Amount Of Trust In This Person
At the forefront of a relationship on the road to marriage is an enormous amount of trust, both in each other and in the strength of the relationship. So when you’ve found someone you could marry one day, you’ll not only feel like you can trust them with anything, but you’ll be confident they place the same amount of trust in you. You’ll know without a doubt that you’re both willing to do whatever you can to ensure your relationship survives in the long run.
“You share a rock solid, mutual understanding that no matter what, both of you will stay in the game,” Dr. Venus Nicolino, PhD, otherwise known as Dr. V, from the hit show Marriage Boot Camp: Reality Stars, told Elite Daily.
While a healthy relationship that makes you happy is always a good sign, it’s not always enough for you to know wholeheartedly that your relationship is destined for marriage. And according to Lori Salkin, SawYouatSinai.com senior matchmaker and dating coach, questioning whether or not you could marry your partner may actually be a good sign. “While it seems contrary to how you should feel when you’ve found the one, worrying about the relationship is healthy and something important that you should feel when you’ve found the man you’re going to marry,” she says. “It shows you are truly invested in every element of the relationship and a future together.”
So as you relish in your relationship and how happy you are, remember to take some time to explore every way it makes you feel. While it’s OK to not know if this relationship is forever just yet, rest assured that, if the feelings here ring true for you, you might just marry your partner one day.