Why Keeping Your Options Open After You’ve Found Someone Great Makes You An Idiot

Why do so many people these days think that even after they’ve someone amazing, they should still keep their options open in case something better comes along? It’s completely absurd, and yet it happens all the time. If you’re single and you’ve had the luxury of winning over an incredibly smart, funny, beautiful man or woman, don’t be a tool and screw it up. Keeping your options open after you’ve found someone truly amazing makes you an idiot — here’s why:

1. YOU’RE NOT GIVING THINGS A REAL CHANCE.

It used to be that when you met someone amazing with whom you had incredible chemistry, you pursued it further and built it into something amazing. These days, it seems like so many people think that something better is always lurking around the corner — and not only does it suck, it’s just not true. Believe it or not, amazing men and women don’t come around all the time, so if you find one who actually wants to try to start something real with you, don’t ruin your chance.

2. YOU’RE GOING TO END UP ALONE IN THE END.

 When you leave a good person behind because you think you can get better, the only thing that you’ll find is a healthy dose or karma reminding you of why you were completely moronic in letting them get away in the first place. While you may find plenty of short term “relationships” to pass your time, years down the line when everyone else has settled into real, lasting companionship, you’ll be on your own. Not a good look.

3. YOUR SELFISHNESS HURTS PEOPLE WHO DON’T DESERVE IT.

A lot of people seem to operate this way because they legit can’t handle being in a grown up relationship, so instead they create the illusion of one until crap starts to get real, and it’s ridiculous. If you can’t handle intimacy and building a solid life with a clearly solid human being, take a seat on the bench because they’re way out of your league.

4. YOU NEED TO LEARN A THING OR TWO ABOUT LOYALTY.

If you ever want to be happy in a relationship, you need to learn and exercise the concept of loyalty. What’s the point in dating and finally finding someone amazing to build something with, only to crap on it completely by accepting their affection while still keeping your eyes peeled for something better? You’re not only wasting your own life away, you’re also wasting someone else’s. Stop being so selfish.

5. IF IT ISN’T BROKEN, DON’T TRY AND FIX IT.

If things are going really well, it makes zero sense to screw around and test the waters for something different or better. When did people get like this? How did we get here? What happened to the good old days of building love from a solid foundation instead of a perfect one? Chasing perfection only robs you of the ability to create your own version of it because you worked at it, not because you searched for a pre-made version that doesn’t actually exist anyway.

6. THE OPTIONS YOU THINK YOU HAVE ARE ONLY AN ILLUSION.

You don’t actually have a ton of better options, you only think that you do because online and modern dating culture deludes you into thinking that the perfect person is only a thumb swipe away. Guess what? Those people didn’t pay attention to you before and they’re not going to start now that you’re acting like a total douchebag. Instead, you need to appreciate what’s right in front of your face before you lose it.

7. TEMPTATION IS A FOOL’S TRAP.

If you’re easily tempted to move along so quickly to the next best thing when what you have is already great, you probably don’t deserve such an awesome partner to begin with. Cycling through this habit is only going to make you a waste of anyone’s time, because loyalty and commitment are still the most important things in any relationship and what anyone who’s serious about love looks for in a partner.

8. YOU’LL REGRET LETTING THEM GO.

 If you’re under the assumption that someone who treats you well and makes you happy means they’re too good to be true and you should look for something different, you’re a total jerk. If you think they’re too good to be true, it’s probably because you’re not good enough for them and you know it. So how can you be good enough? Treat them with respect, dignity, and appreciation. It really is that simple.

9. THEY DESERVE BETTER.

It’s not right that people who are serious about love keep encountering jerks like this and if you’re one of them, congratulations on contributing to the disaster that is modern dating culture. It’s not even fun anymore. Do us all a favor and if you don’t know what you want, stop dating the good and honest people who do. You’re a moron if you continue to keep your options open when you already have an amazing person in your life.

By Andrea Wesley for Bolde

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