When You Commit To Someone, You Cannot Invest Halfway

Commitments are supposed to mean something. Promises are supposed to mean something.

Even if you have only been in a relationship with someone for a week or a month, you should not treat them as a backup plan. You should not be dedicated to them during weekdays but act single on weekends.

Committing to someone means you are planning on staying with them and building with them. It means your feelings for them are strong and growing stronger by the moment. It means you are willing to make sacrifices to them, you are willing to move around your schedule for them, you are willing to sort them at the top of your priorities list.

If you only want to invest halfway, you should not be dating in the first place. You should continue playing the field. You cannot call someone your person and then hit on strangers when you’re wasted. You cannot claim you are in a monogamous relationship and then turn around and cheat. You cannot pick and choose when you want to be a homebody and when you want to be a player.

When you commit, you have to be all in. Your person deserves the best of you. You cannot give them bits and pieces of your heart. You have to give them the entire thing.

Commitment means keeping in contact. It means telling each other everything. It means planning dates. It means meeting the family. It means celebrating holidays together. It means acting as partners. It means becoming best friends.

Commitments take work — and if you do not want to do the work, then you shouldn’t have signed up for a relationship. In order to keep your love strong, you have to put in constant effort. You cannot slack. You cannot let yourself become lazy. You have to give your person what they deserve. Otherwise they are going to realize they are better off without you.

You should not agree to date someone if you would rather be alone. You should not call someone your forever if you’re using them as a placeholder until someone better comes along. You should not wear a ring if your eyes are constantly wandering.

Commitment means your feelings are serious. It means you do not want anyone else. It means you are going to try your hardest to make the relationship last forever.

Even though you might not be married to a person yet, that does not mean you have permission to abuse their emotions. Do not lie about how much you like them. Do not swear you will stay faithful if you have other plans in mind.

Stay single if you want to keep kissing other lips. Only commit when you are ready. When you believe you have found a person who is worth all of the risks.

When you commit to someone, you cannot give them half of your attention, half of your trust, half of your heart. Relationships require you to take a leap. If you are not ready for that, then you are not ready for a real commitment.

By Holly Riordan for ThoughtCatalog


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